he was beginning to realize that all this time his mind — and his heart — had been holding out hope for nate. even though he kept telling everyone that nate wasn’t gay and that he believed nate… he hadn’t actually believed himself.

he kept thinking that nate would realize, would have some kind of hallelujah moment, would come to the sudden realization that he wanted kit. that, eventually, all this sexual tension had to lead somewhere.

only now did he realize that it didn’t have to.

maybe nate had been totally transparent with kit. not just maybe — but probably. because it seemed like not only did nate not want to have sex with kit… he didn’t really want to have sex with anybody. kit had been living in this house with nate for months and in all that time nate hadn’t complained about missing sex. ever.

and he certainly hadn’t had any.

maybe nate was asexual.

not aromantic — obviously — he lived for cuddles. but just…

god. kit couldn’t deal with that. he couldn’t…